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Exactly What to Say: The Magic Words for Influence and Impact

About 1500 wordsAbout 5 min

Book ReviewPersuasionCommunication Skills

2025-04-30

Magic Words are sets of words that talk straight to the subconscious brain, giving you a fair advantage in conversation and helping you get your way more often.

As I flipped through the pages of this captivating book, I was immediately drawn into a world where words hold unparalleled power. Authored by a seasoned expert in communication and sales, this gem uncovers the secret language of influence through what the author calls "Magic Words." These aren’t just catchy phrases; they are meticulously crafted sets of words designed to bypass the conscious mind and speak directly to the subconscious, where decisions are often made on instinct. Whether you're a sales professional, a business owner, or simply someone looking to enhance personal interactions, this book offers a treasure trove of linguistic tools to elevate your conversational game. With real-world examples and actionable insights, it promises not just to teach but to transform the way you communicate.

Rejection-Free Introductions

Learn how to introduce ideas without fear of rejection using the phrase "I’m not sure if it’s for you, but..."

There’s no pressure here.

Open-Minded Engagement

Encourage agreement by appealing to others’ desire to be seen as open-minded with "How open-minded are you?"

Everybody wants to be open-minded.

Controlling Conversations

Regain control in debates by questioning knowledge with "What do you know about...?"

Softly threaten their knowledge base.

Emotional Motivation

Trigger emotional responses to influence decisions using "How would you feel if...?"

Something has to feel right before it makes sense.

Imaginative Persuasion

Paint vivid mental pictures to drive decisions with "Just imagine..."

If you cannot see yourself doing something, the chances are slim.

Rejection-Free Introductions

Crafting a Safe Entry Point

One of the standout strategies in this book is the use of "I’m not sure if it’s for you, but..." to introduce ideas, products, or invitations without the sting of potential rejection. This phrase is a game-changer, as it subtly signals to the listener that there’s no pressure, instantly lowering their defenses. The author notes that this approach spikes curiosity, making the listener eager to know more about what “it” is. The brilliance lies in the word “but,” which negates any prior hesitation and nudges the subconscious to consider the offer seriously.

Key Insight with Emphasis

I’m not sure if it’s for you, but... causes the listener’s subconscious brain to hear, “There’s no pressure here.”

Deep Dive into Application

The book provides practical examples like, “I’m not sure if it’s for you, but would you happen to know someone who is interested in our product?” or “I’m not sure if it’s for you, but this option is available for this month only.” These examples show how to weave this phrase into everyday scenarios, ensuring a rejection-free conversation. The outcome is simple: either the listener shows personal interest, or at worst, they promise to think about it. This technique is particularly powerful for sales professionals or anyone hesitant to pitch ideas due to fear of rejection. The author’s emphasis on real-world application ensures that readers can immediately test this in their interactions, making it a low-risk, high-reward strategy.

Open-Minded Engagement

Leveraging a Universal Desire

Appealing to someone’s self-perception as being open-minded is a subtle yet effective way to gain agreement. The question “How open-minded are you?” taps into a near-universal desire to be seen as progressive and receptive. The book highlights that over 90% of people would identify as open-minded if asked, making this a strategic entry point for introducing new ideas.

Key Insight with Emphasis

Everybody wants to be open-minded, and this shifts the odds of agreement to 90-10 in your favor.

Exploring the Impact

This phrase works wonders whether you’re speaking to a stranger, a friend, or a team member. By prefacing a new concept with this question, you naturally attract support because no one wants to appear closed-minded. The author provides scenarios like pitching a novel idea to a prospect or rallying a team for change, showing how this phrase tilts the conversation in your favor. The psychological underpinning is clear: people’s self-image drives their responses, and this Magic Word leverages that beautifully. Readers are encouraged to use this in situations where buy-in is crucial, transforming potential resistance into curiosity and collaboration.

Controlling Conversations

Redirecting Debates with Questions

Conversations often derail into debates when someone asserts they “know best.” The author introduces the phrase “What do you know about...?” as a powerful tool to regain control. This question softly challenges the other person’s certainty, prompting them to justify their stance or admit a lack of evidence. It’s a subtle way to shift the dynamic without confrontation.

Key Insight with Emphasis

What do you know about...? forces them to share the reference on which their argument is based.

Unpacking the Strategy

The book details how this phrase can be used in various contexts, such as “What do you know about how things really work here?” or “What do you know about the benefits of this product?” The goal isn’t to win an argument but to move the other person from certainty to doubt, making them more receptive to your perspective. This technique is invaluable for negotiations or discussions where opinions clash, as it maintains civility while steering the conversation back to your advantage. The author’s examples illustrate how this question often reveals unfounded opinions, opening the door for constructive dialogue and influence.

Emotional Motivation

Triggering Decisions Through Feelings

Understanding motivation as “a reason to move” is central to persuasion, and the phrase “How would you feel if...?” is a master key to unlocking emotional responses. The book explains that decisions are made emotionally before logically, and this phrase allows the listener to time-travel to a future scenario, experiencing the associated feelings.

Key Insight with Emphasis

Something has to feel right before it ever makes sense, driving decisions through emotion first.

Visualizing Emotional Impact

To illustrate the power of emotional contrast, let’s consider the concept of avoiding loss versus achieving gain. The author notes that people work harder to avoid loss, a principle that can be visualized as:

Emotional Drivers

Detailed Application

This Magic Word is applied in scenarios like “How would you feel if you missed this opportunity?” or “How would you feel if you achieved this goal?” By creating conditional future-facing scenarios, you help others visualize outcomes, making them more likely to act to avoid pain or pursue pleasure. The author emphasizes crafting scenarios with both positive and negative emotional triggers to maximize impact, preparing the listener to accept your guidance toward success or away from loss. This section is a deep dive into human psychology, offering readers a framework to influence through empathy and foresight.

Imaginative Persuasion

Painting Mental Pictures

The phrase “Just imagine...” taps into the subconscious by activating the mind’s image viewer, compelling the listener to picture a scenario before deciding. The book reveals that every decision is made twice—first in the mind, then in reality. If someone can’t visualize themselves doing something, they’re unlikely to do it.

Key Insight with Emphasis

If you cannot see yourself doing something, the chances of you doing it are slim to none.

Bringing Scenarios to Life

Examples like “Just imagine how things will be in six months once you’ve implemented this,” or “Just imagine the look on your kids’ faces when they see you achieve this,” show how to use imagination as a persuasive tool. The author stresses that letting the listener’s mind build the case saves you effort and creates a more vivid reality than any description. This technique is particularly effective in sales or motivational contexts, where visualizing success (like driving a new car or receiving an award) boosts belief and action. Readers are encouraged to craft personalized, emotionally charged images to maximize influence, making this a standout strategy for inspiring change.